It's Soap. Deal With It.
No returns, no refunds, no exceptions. It's soap.
Hate it? Wash your shoes with it or mail it to your ex.
Think of it as a commitment exercise - finally, something you can stick with.
But What If I Really Hate It?
Listen, we're not your therapist. We make soap. Good soap. Soap with personality.
If you hate personality in your hygiene products, maybe stick to the grocery store aisle of sadness.
All sales are final because:
- It's soap, not a life-changing decision
- We're confident you'll love it (we're right about these things)
- Commitment issues aren't our problem
- You'll probably want to buy more anyway
Creative Uses If You're Stubborn
Since you're stuck with it anyway, here are some alternative uses:
- Wash your car (it'll smell better than you do)
- Gift it to someone you're mildly annoyed with
- Use it as intended and maybe learn to appreciate quality
- Keep it as a reminder of that time you made an impulse purchase
- Mail it to your ex with a passive-aggressive note